Monday, January 30, 2006

Luigi VS Jesus

Catholic Church must prove Jesus Existed.

That's right, an italian atheist is taking his schoolfriend and town priest to court because the priest published in the church bulletin that Jesus existed. The priest now has to go on the stand and prove that Jesus Christ was an actual person.

All I am saying about this one is if O.J. can buy justice than the Roman Catholic Church could buy all the justice in the world, make it dress up in a diaper and sing "Hark the Herald Angels Sing" while crapping over everyone who listens. If this sounds absurd, well, don't worry I've created an artist's sketch to approximate the event which should help with visualization:

There, if that's not clear then I don't know what it is... wait, I do. It's Stephen Harper ending all of his stump speeches running up to the election with "God Bless You and God Bless Canada." The scary difference between Harper and Bush is that Harper means it.

God Bless You Readers and God Bless Canada.

The Bloginator.

Monday, January 23, 2006

The First Post On Election Day

Hey hey, what can we say, it's election day.
Martin's a Mess,
Duceppe's still less,
And Harper's a F***ING PSYCHO!

Well I've decided to kick it off with a bang here at the floater blog with a limerick. Let's be honest, readers, and admit that this limerick is about as big as a bang as you could get. P.S. my mom might read this so I put those asterisks in for you mom! Also P.S. P.S. is supposed to go at the end, but IM DOIN IT AT THE TOP BABY! CAUSE THAT'S HOW WE ROLL ON THIS BLOG!!!

So Tony Ianno (The liberal incumbent in my riding) has been accused of setting up a trust fund to recieve political donations. "That means anonymous donors have been able to give Ianno unlimited quantities of money under the table." (
Now, I'm not about to make libelous accusations without any cold hard evidence, so I won't say he's guilty but I will say he's shmuilty and that rhymes with guilty so you can draw your own conclusions from that. Anyhoo, none of the other candidates have been accused of corruption. So they have that going for them. Chow's gonna win. That's my prediction and so far I'm shooting 100 percent on my online election predictions for 2006.

Finally I leave you with this...

The love of my life, B.C. (behind a few select people of course).

That's it!

The Blogastair.