Friday, October 13, 2006

Mcdonald's Corporate Jet engages Swiss Air Force in Air to Air Combat!

Last month Switzerland dealt a crippling blow to McDonald's by passing a law which bans fast food from being sold to minors. Last night, McDonald's struck back. Hard.

In a shocking development one of McDonald's corporate jets entered Swiss airspace under the guise of 'conducting business' early last night. The jet then proceeded to shoot down two fighter jets from the Swiss Air Force who happened to be on route to a training mission. More fighters were scrambled and a dog fight ensued resulting in the loss of two more Swiss jets before the McDonald's plane fled the area.



Satellite Photo of the McDonald's Jet dodging a Swiss missile

"We just had no idea their jet had that kind of military capability. It was over before it started. I'll never eat a Big Mac again."
-
Matthias Weibel, Brigadier General of the Swiss Air Force

McDonald's released a statement to the press shortly after the attack:


"It's unfortunate it had to come to this but we will not negotiate with terrorists. They can keep our young Swiss hostage but we will continue to pursue military action against them until they release the minors of Switzerland to eat where they please."
- Jim Skinner, CEO McDonald's Corp


Effigies of Hamburgler and Ronald McDonald have been burned at public demonstrations across the country. Swiss President,
Moritz Leuenberger, has vowed to keep all the countries citizens safe from harm.

"Whether it be from trans-fat laden food or precision military strikes, the Government will protect you from McDonald's."
- Moritz Leuenberger, President of Switzerland


The Western world eagerly awaits the outcome of this corporate war as it will have a watershed effect on future international business.

- The Blogastair reporting live, Swiss Federal Council Chambers, Switzerland

11 comments:

robkroese said...

McDonalds would be an even more formidable fighting force if they didn't waste so much of their defense budget on boondoggles like the Arch Deluxe Stealth Fighter.

Alastair P. Forbes said...

I agree. They really messed up when they decided to put their logo on their 'Stealth' Fighter. Someone really wasn't thinking there.

robkroese said...

It's always those idiots in marketing screwing things up.

Very funny, and thanks for the link!

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