The first day of March always brings in a few surprises but few thought they would ever witness something like this in their lifetime. A Canadian man, Graeme Stewart has climbed Big Ben (yes, the Big Ben in London England) causing over two hundred thousand pounds worth of damage to the clock itself and billions to investors in the London Stock Exchange.
At 2pm local time Graeme Stewart ascended the face of Big Ben, unnoticed and perched atop the hour hand of the famous clock. His weight, which can only be described as extraordinary, forced the hour hand forward and in a span of 15 minutes the distinguished donger was 2 and half hours fast.
At 2pm local time Graeme Stewart ascended the face of Big Ben, unnoticed and perched atop the hour hand of the famous clock. His weight, which can only be described as extraordinary, forced the hour hand forward and in a span of 15 minutes the distinguished donger was 2 and half hours fast.
Crazed Stewart perching atop Big Ben
If the damage to the clock was the only consequence, this episode would probably seem more funny than alarming. But sadly, all of London sets their time by Big Ben including the renowned London Stock Exchange, which on March 1st closed a full hour and 45 minutes early due to a 'malfunctioning clock.' The last hour and a half of trading is typically the busiest time with over a billion and half pounds moved in that period. A staggering amount of pounds to lay stagnant because of a crazed clock climber.
Further damage was done to London's Public Hydro industry as the entire city turned out their lights a full two hours and fifteen minutes early costing the government millions in unearned revenue. Prime Minister Blair was quoted as saying:
"That daft bugger, I should take my torch and club him into the jam sandwich myself. Once he's winkin in the clink like a dog-end he'll be using a zimmer by the time we're done with 'im"
- Prime Minister Tony Blair
The Prime Minister couldn't be reached for further comment as he went to bed early.
Perhaps the strangest part of this strange affair is why the culprit was clad only in a bathing suit, flip flops and girly bandana. When asked, as he was being led away by the bobbies, Stewart replied "I sweat a lot." And the towel? "To wipe the sweat from my eyes and hands." Well at least he thought that far ahead.
The Blooogerblogger, reporting on location, London, England.
Further damage was done to London's Public Hydro industry as the entire city turned out their lights a full two hours and fifteen minutes early costing the government millions in unearned revenue. Prime Minister Blair was quoted as saying:
"That daft bugger, I should take my torch and club him into the jam sandwich myself. Once he's winkin in the clink like a dog-end he'll be using a zimmer by the time we're done with 'im"
- Prime Minister Tony Blair
The Prime Minister couldn't be reached for further comment as he went to bed early.
Perhaps the strangest part of this strange affair is why the culprit was clad only in a bathing suit, flip flops and girly bandana. When asked, as he was being led away by the bobbies, Stewart replied "I sweat a lot." And the towel? "To wipe the sweat from my eyes and hands." Well at least he thought that far ahead.
The Blooogerblogger, reporting on location, London, England.
8 comments:
If the clock was 2.5 hours fast, why did the stock exchange only close 1 hour and 45 minutes early, and why did brits turn out their lights 2 hour and 15 minutes early. Many unanswered questions. Shabby reporting at best.
Bill Nye
And you know what? I'd do it again. These manky british need to be taken down a peg or two. Next time though, I'm wearing earmuffs. Its cold here.
And to Tony Blair, I say: bring it on, you big-eared, new labour third way, monkey lover. That's right Tony. We all know.
First of all 'Bill Nye,' fraud is an extremely vile and portentious thing. Pretending to be someone else or making up quotes from sources is reprehensible and you should feel ashamed.
How do I know you're not Bill Nye? Well Bill Nye would know that my science was right!
Everyone knows the LSE closes trading at 4pm. 2 hours after Graeme pushed the clock ahead BUT it took Stewart's colossal weight 15 minutes to push the clock ahead... THUS the LSE closed 1 hour and 45 minutes early.
The clock was pushed ahead 2 and half hours BUT again it took 15 minutes to get there SO everyone turns out their lights 2 hours and 15 minutes in advance.
Well 'Bill Nye' I'm one step closer to discovering your true identity... you had better be shaking in your bahoo tahees.
And to Graeme, Great to have a celebrity like you commenting on my blog! I was wondering if you wouldn't mind commenting on my recent 'floater poll' which do you feel is the real reason? Or was their something I missed?
I just think Graeme has no fashion sense. Everyone knows by now that rubber chickens are the things to wear over your baby-makers. Shorts are soooo last Olympics.
St. Reaker
Well, Alastair, I'm glad you asked. You see, all the "Floater Poll" options did play a part in my decision to scale Big Ben...the "rich tapestry" of my disturbed, anti-social behavious. But the real inspiration was, funnily enough, the Floater Blog. Here is a man making a difference for thousands...nay, millions...of needy people the world over using a little HTML code and an XML feed. So I though, why not me? So I stripped down to my trunks (which I always wear, because I am, indeed, never-nude), grabbed my trusty towel/rappeling cloth, donned some gang colours and took to the skies. Of course, the ultimate success of my escapade is somewhat debatable, but you have to admit my heart was in the right place.
everyone knows this is a load of shit because A it is clearly photoshopped and B it is kind of strange you're the only one in the world to publish such a major event
Bill Nye Jr.
After climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb. See the link below for more info.
#climbs
www.ufgop.org
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